


they've kissed each other...

by survivalinstinctvalkyria



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: 50 short one shots based on a Tumblr post, Bumping the rating up because Mao wants to do... Things to Ritsu, I don't think any of this will be edited, I'm doing my best, M/M, Rating may change in later chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-10-10
Packaged: 2019-06-23 18:00:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 9,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15611865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/survivalinstinctvalkyria/pseuds/survivalinstinctvalkyria
Summary: Little snapshots into Mao and Ritsu's relationship, or, more specifically, fifty kisses they've shared.





	1. ...goodmorning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [guiltykissmyass](https://archiveofourown.org/users/guiltykissmyass/gifts), [izukasa](https://archiveofourown.org/users/izukasa/gifts).



> Based on [](%E2%80%9D)<https://aurorasmemes.tumblr.com/post/171728285631/fifty-ways-to-kiss-someone-send-me-a-and-i> ”> this! 
> 
> This is my first time linking text, so bear with me if it doesn't work, alright? (I've given up, I'll have one of my techy friends help me tomorrow.)
> 
> I'm back! It's been a while (at least that's what it feels like) since I've written for this fandom, so, hello ＼(⌒▽⌒)
> 
> —side note, I've recently discovered kaomoji from the Bandori fic I'm writing in which the characters interact over text messaging, and... They're so cute!!—
> 
> The last fic I wrote was for my best CGSS's girls birthday, and I've been lacking in motivation, but I'm back!
> 
> I'll try to update this everyday, even if it's short.
> 
> (Also, CJ, I love you, but it's really embarrassing gifting this to you with that user.)

“Ritsu, wake up…!”

It's a futile attempt, he knows. Trying to wake Ritsu up is like trying to have a conversation with a rock—impossible. No matter what he does, Ritsu will just turn the other way and ignore him. It doesn't help Mao’s nerves that they need to be at school in ten minutes, either.

Another shove goes over without a reaction from Ritsu, along with a loud  _ wake up! _ , so Mao decides he's deserving of a break. Bending down into a squat, he looks to his side to make sure everything is in place. Everything seems to be in place: Ritsu’s  _ very nutritious  _ breakfast consisting of a slice of bread with a bit jam hastily spread across it lies on the otherwise vacant desk, his pajamas are laid out across the foot of his bed (Mao had debated changing him while he was sleeping, but simply didn't have the willpower to do it), even his carelessly completed homework has been shoved into his backpack, resting at the foot of his bed.

Looking back to Ritsu's sleeping form, Mao lets all of his frustrations out in one collective sigh. Maybe he should just go full a dish with water and dump it on Ritsu, it serves him right, after all. But… after he finds his eyes drawn to Ritsu's face, he finds his resolve to do so dissolving.

No matter when or where, Ritsu always looks peaceful when he sleeps. Even if his eyes carry a spark of suspicion and distrust ghosting just behind them in his few hours of being awake, when he falls asleep, it all fades away into his hot breath released in gentle exhalations. Even if during those oh, so fleeting hours hours when he's at full consciousness, he stands strong and apart from everyone else, not wanting them to get involved, to test him, when he returns to his near-eternal rest, he curls in on himself, and attains an air of a fragile, precious doll.

Looking at Ritsu like this, it's hard to even find the resolve to wake him at all.

_ He's like a princess,  _ Mao muses, letting his hands drift over Ritsu's cheek, a ghost of an embrace.  _ Maybe… I could wake him like one. _

It's a pretty stupid idea, all things considered. If Ritsu somehow became aware of the fact that Mao kissed him while he was sleeping, he knows he'll never hear the end of it.

But… the chances of Ritsu  _ actually  _ waking up are pretty slim, so it can't be  _ that  _ much of a risk, right?

With that thought in mind, Mao moves his hand down to rest on Ritsu’s shoulder, steadying himself as he leans down to press his lips again Ritsu's.

_ It's funny _ , Mao thinks, almost immediately, _ even when he's sleeping, he's still undeniably good at kissing. _

It can't be a surprise, Ritsu's lips are still soft and plush against his, and Mao finds himself pressing in eagerly for more—

Until he feels the sensation of Ritsu's eyelashes batting against his eyelids, and hears a faint noise from Ritsu. Immediately, he pulls away, his face flushing to the shade of his hair. Ritsu's expression remains blank at first—surprised, maybe even embarrassed—before his lips curl into a cat-like grin.

“I should've known Maa-kun had fantasized about waking me up like I'm Sleeping Beauty. Good morning, Maa-kun,” he drawls out, and Mao feels his life force draining out of him.

But he still answers Ritsu as he should: with an undeniable, patient love.

“I—yeah, good morning, Ritsu.”


	2. ...goodnight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mao's tired and Ritsu is warm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm tired.
> 
> Kinda important news: I'm hopping on the bandwagon and doing an interactive death game on Twitter! Mine is for the million live character, so please check it out if interested! The user is @lastmillionlive!

With each passing step, Mao’s pace becomes more erratic, to the point he's more stumbling than walking as he staggers down the sidewalk.

Honestly, it's not like he can take all the blame for being this exhausted. He'd been fine during the classes, maybe just a bit tired, if anything. Unit practice hadn't been that difficult either. Sure, he had made a few mistakes—stumbling during more intricate moves, dancing a few steps behind, and having the tempo elude him completely, to name a few—but it wasn't anything to be concerned about. During basketball club was when it started getting bad, though; after one game, he was too dizzy to play, and had to sit out for the rest of practice. By the time he was working on paperwork in the student council room, he could barely keep his eyes open, and when his head hit the table, Keito woke him abruptly and sent him home.

So, in conclusion, it's  _ life's  _ fault. Yeah, sometimes life gets hard, but if Mao backs down, then he'll never improve. Even if it means being tired on occasion.

“Maa-kun overworks himself too much. You should take a break.”

Or maybe not, if he asks Ritsu.

“I told you, I'm fine,” he retorts, although the fact that his words are coupled with him nearly tumbling into one of their neighbor’s bushes doesn't exactly prove it point.

“Says the person that Kei-chan, of all people, sent home,” is Ritsu's response. Mao just sighs.

They reach Ritsu's house, and Mao turns back to say goodbye. Today, Mao hadn't given Ritsu a ride, he wouldn't have been able to, and he's thankful that Ritsu didn't whine about it. Heck, he even took Mao’s bag for him, despite Mao's insistence that he didn't have to. Just as he's about to turn back, Ritsu grabs his wrist.

“Stay over. My house is better for sleeping,” he insists.

“No, I- first I have to do my homework, and… having you try to put me to bed won't help my productivity.”

“You're not going to be productive either way with how tired you are,” Ritsu points out.

“... Fair point.” As he says that, a smile brandishes Ritsu's face. “Wake me up around one or something.”

Ritsu nods, and walks over to hold the door open for Mao. A slurred  _ thank you _ is spoken in response, and Ritsu almost giggles at how cute it is.

Well, Mao is always cute, but he's especially cute like this—tired, slothish, and as helpless as a baby.

Ritsu practically has to push Mao up the stairs, but he doesn't complain. Their backpacks are haphazardly thrown against the door as the walk into the room, and their blazers are shrugged off as well.

Despite himself, Mao collapses onto Ritsu's bed immediately, not even trying to get under the covers. He feels the push of the mattress press down at his side, and the weight of Ritsu's body press against him.

“You need… to wake… me up…”

The way that his voice slurs his speech must tell Ritsu that his words don't hold much authority, because he just curls up against Mao’s side.

“Shush, you need to sleep, Maa-kun. Turn over, let me cuddle you.”

With no reason to object, Mao complies, and lets Ritsu wrap his arms around him. He mirrors the sentiment as best he can.

It's undeniably warm. With their bodies flush together like this, and feeling the older boy's gentle breath against his chin, he feels more at home than he ever could in his own home. Even if Ritsu doesn't wake up and they can't finish their homework, right now, Mao doesn't mind.

Just as he drifts into the clutches of sleep, he feels something warm against his lips. It's only lasts a second, before it's pulled away, and he hears a muffled  _ goodnight _ .

Pulling Ritsu closer, he smiles, and tries to slur out his own  _ goodnight _ as he falls into the tendrils of sleep.


	3. ...goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mao's farewell to Ritsu is timed perfectly with sun's brilliant aidue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this one's my favorite so far??? It's soft

Dusk greets the world in purplish hues, bright street lights, and hushed conversation. In the dimming on storefront windows that makes some feel lonely and others to turn their attention to the bustling crowd hidden in its shadows.

Dusk means the sunset—the sun’s gentle _aidue_ at the end of each day, welcoming the veil of the moon. Watching the sunset is perfect for dates, a staple romantic sentiment, something that everyone dreams of at least once.

And even when it's over, you can still gaze up serenely at the moon, before turning to your partner with a gaze of fondness and love and ask: _the moon is beautiful, isn't it?_

(And if all of the twinkling stars—arranged like each constellation is a city comprised of streetlights—align, then maybe, they'll agree, and ask if you'd like to view the display with them again tomorrow, or, better yet, for the rest of your days.)

Night is fitting for Ritsu, inhumanly pale skin a perfect contrast to the darkness that surrounds him, like someone had erased his silhouette, before drawing in two bright red eyes. Yes, even in the black of night, Ritsu's eyes still glow like garnets.

If night is perfect for Ritsu, then the day is meant for Mao. Bright and energetic, with boisterous laughter and unbridled socialism, tanned skin making the sun blend into him gorgeously.

So dawn and dusk are the intervals between them, the former being Mao’s time to awaken to sunlight as Ritsu curses the blasphemous thing, and the latter being when Ritsu opens his eyes fully to prepare for his night of redundant energy as Mao falls asleep with the moonlight as a blanket.

With how their lives seem to rotate on different axis, it's hard to plan dates that perfectly work for both of them, but they manage. Mao secretly wishes their date could last into the depths of night, but he knows that'd be irresponsible. Tomorrow he has a weekend practice with Trickstar, so he can't sleep in.

Ritsu's become more understanding of that, he thinks, because he doesn't grumble anymore when Mao says that's why he can't stay up late with Ritsu, now he just makes a sad face and snuggles closer to Mao for a moment. Mao feels lucky that someone as clingy as Ritsu is that flexible for him.

Mao holds back a yawn, the sunset's hypnotic effect taking hold of him. Ritsu notices with piercing eyes, awake and foreboding, the sign that he's finally waking up. When his gaze softens, Mao realizes that his eyes are speckled with purple and gold, like someone and dripped paint into his red eyes and let it spread like a galaxy.

That thought brings another in its wake: Mao _really_ wishes he could stay up later with Ritsu. He'd probably be teased by Ritsu—something along the lines of _can't get enough of irresistible I am, Maa-kun?—_ if he mentioned that, so he doesn't dare say it.

There's one thing he can do, though.

He reaches out for Ritsu, and wraps his arms around his waist, before pressing his lips to Ritsu's. When Ritsu's palms meet his cheeks, he smiles into the kiss, and feels Ritsu do the same.

Like this, he feels it the most: it really is a shame he can't stay up later with Ritsu. It's nothing wishing will change, but he still does wish.

Pulling back to gaze at Ritsu's face, he feels the burst of warmth dispel any despair he may have felt, and resolves that he'll greet Ritsu with a kiss tomorrow.


	4. ...where it hurts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looking at Mao's injury in pity, he manages to put the thought in his head that the pain in his heart is far worse, before scolding himself for thinking something so selfish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is longest yet, I think.
> 
> I don't really like it that much but it's here.
> 
> (And at 4:30 am because I don't know what sleep is.)

“You shouldn't have pushed yourself so hard.”

Normally, Ritsu wouldn't be the one scolding Mao, but desperate times call for desperate measures. The boy in question just sighs and averts his gaze.

“It's not like I wanted this to happen,” he retorts.

Ritsu just nods and goes to inspect the injury. It's a large gash on Mao’s knee, the consequence of him falling down as he tried to slide across the floor. It must have been painful, and Ritsu regrets letting finish the game.

The scariest thing for Ritsu is the thought that, knowing Mao, things like this will keep happening. He'll keep trying to push himself, and just end up hurt. And a lot of those times, he thinks, it'll be his fault.

Maybe it's his fault that Mao is like this in the first place. Maybe, if he weren't so clingy and  _ useless _ , Mao wouldn't have developed the habit of always pushing himself too hard for other people, and most times, not getting anything in return.

That thought _ hurts _ . Maybe more than the gash on Mao's knee, he dares to think, before pushing away the thought and scolding himself for being selfish. Usually, he'd never scold himself, but seeing how Mao's predicament may actually be his fault indirectly, he's willing to make exceptions.

After inspecting the damage on Mao’s knee, he stands up to go get a paper towel. As he's wetting it under the faucet, Mao speaks up.

“You seem surprisingly prepared for this. I wouldn't expect you to even have a clue what to do. Is there something you aren't telling me about?” Mao inquires from his seat, mostly in jest, although a small fragment of his voice carries genuine curiosity.

“I'll manage if it's for Maa-kun,” he replies. It's a simple answer, veering just to the side of white lie, because it's true, but not the whole picture.

Saying 'he’ll manage’, like he hasn't personally taken this upon himself, not letting it show that he actually worries constantly for Mao’s sake, these are just more little white lies that he'll have to burn away from Mao's memory, although they'll forever be engraved into his own.

He wrings the paper towel, watching as the excess drops of water cascade down into the faucet, and then are swept away forever. As he watches, he wonders if this might become a tangible form of Mao's feelings for him one day, simply wrung out once Mao gets tired of him, and washed away for good.

He curses the thought as he turns back to Mao. Placing his hand over Mao’s, currently holding down a piece of cloth over his wound, he lifts it up and turns Mao's hand over, so that his is underneath.

“You bled a lot. I'm surprised you  _ wanted _ to keep playing,” he says with a surprisingly neutral tone.

“Well, I couldn't just quit—and besides, it's stopped bleeding now,” is Mao's response. Ritsu just  _ tsks  _ in response.

_ Stupid, stupid… _

_ But also my fault _ , he thinks.

As he goes to clean the wound with the damp paper towel, Mao flinches, already sensing that the sensation won't be a pleasant one. That's fine—Ritsu can't really blame him. So instead of trying again, he firsts leans down to press his lips to the wound.

It's just a press of his lips, not even on Mao's own lips, but it still makes his stomach churn and his face warm. He can feel Mao tense under his lips, and only when he relaxes, does he pull away.

“Did that help?” he asks, innocently enough.

“... Sure, it did. Thanks, Ritsu,” Mao responds, half in sarcasm, and half in genuine gratitude for the sincerity of the gesture.

Nodding, Ritsu returns to the task at hand, and starts wiping the wound, cleaning it from any dirt that may have found its way in. Once he's satisfied, he tosses the paper towel in the general direction of the waste basket (and, predictably, misses), before reaching into his first aid kit to pull out the bandage. The one he chooses is a large square-shaped bandage, maybe not the best for his knee, but it should cover the wound.

With as much fondness as he can turn to gentleness, he presses to the bandage to Mao's injury, smoothing it out so that it covers the full expanse of the wound. Now that the wound is taken care of and covered, nothing is stopping him from pressing another chaste kiss to it, and Mao chuckles at the sensation.

Words fail Ritsu when Mao grabs ahold of Ritsu's hands, pulling them behind him as he leans back in the stool, conveniently pulling Ritsu close enough for him to press a kiss to Ritsu's lips.

“Thank you,” he breathes onto Ritsu's lips, and Ritsu's first thought in reply is,  _ No, thank you; thank you for letting me take care of you. _

His thank you comes in the form of a second kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've posted every one of these between 1-5 am what's wrong with me


	5. ...where it doesn't hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mao should've known he'd have to apply aloe vera to Ritsu's back after a day out at the beach.
> 
> (He should've also been prepared to keep his more... shameful thoughts in check while doing so.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this while talking with Cj (@guiltykissmyass on here) and we came to the conclusion that Mao tops Ritsu, no question.
> 
> We came to this conclusion at six am.

“How long do we have to stay out here?” Ritsu asks Mao, a crease forming between his brows as he pouts. “I feel like hell.”

“We need to let the first years have some fun. Not everything's about you, Ritsu,” Mao reminds him with a sigh. “I'm pretty sure I put on _extra_ sunscreen, how on Earth did you get burned so badly?”

Ritsu shrugs. “I'm a vampire _—_ making me sit in direct sunlight, even with the umbrella, was a death warrant.” Closing his eyes, he shakes his head in disdain, and hopes that Mao’s face is regretful.

“Sorry, sorry,” Mao says lightly. “You're lucky Sakuma-senpai lent us his aloe vera, it would have been even worse without it." At that statement, Ritsu recoils.

“This is Anija's? I don't want it on me, go throw it in the ocean,” he demands, lips taut and brows furrowed. When he looks back to glare at Mao in irritation, Mao is almost taken aback by how _cute_ he looks. Seeing genuine emotion on Ritsu's already doll-like features is a sight for sore eyes, even if he's glaring at Mao.

“Too late. Just let me put it on, alright?” His tone is gentler this time, like a mother trying to feed a sick child some medicine. “I know it might hurt a bit, but bare with me.”

With that warning spoken, he begins to squirt the gel onto his fingers. Afterwards, he slowly presses his hand to Ritsu's back, just above his shoulder blade. Ritsu flinches at the coldness of it, his skin already hyper-sensitive from the burn, but after a moment, he relaxes under Mao’s gentle touch. Once Ritsu's relaxed, Mao sets to work at spreading the aloe vera onto his skin. Even when it's burnt like this, it's still pretty to look at, almost like his entire body is flushed from embarrassment (what that thought implies makes Mao’s own skin burn), and definitely is still soft to the touch. Embarrassed at how distracted he's gotten, he snaps out of his thoughts to inspect Ritsu's back and arms; they look like they have enough aloe vera rubbed into them, so he softly speaks up for Ritsu to turn around.

Ritsu complies without complaint, leaning back on his palms with his arms outstretched so that his chest is fully accessible to Mao. Now that Ritsu's face is revealed to him, he can see the other boy’s face, a lazy and content smile played out over his features. Without delay, Mao presses his fingers to Ritsu's front, this time spreading the gel from his neck to his naval. As a passing thought, Mao realizes that Ritsu's skin is even softer here, perfect for him to lean down and… No, no, no _—_ he is not going to finish that thought with Ritsu sitting right in front of him.

 

“I get that you like having your hands on me, but you've been rubbing the same spot for quite some time, Maa-kun. Are your thoughts on the same page as mine, or have they strayed further…?” Ritsu ponders below him, with a devilish tone that makes his stomach lurch. Snapped out of his (less desirable) thoughts, Mao blinks a few times, and discovers that his hands have remained stagnant on Ritsu's collarbone, a discovery which makes his face flame into a brilliant shade of red.

“Well, I'm sorry,” he says offhandedly. Reluctantly, he removes his hand from Ritsu's chest, and goes to wipe the excess gel off.

“Don't be. It makes me feel special, knowing that my collected Maa-kun thinks about me like that,” Ritsu interjects with a smile. "Whatever you have in mind, I'm too burnt for it, anyway." He makes an attempt to lie down, but flinches once his back hits the towel. “Maa-kun, it still hurts,” he whines.

“Duh, I'm not a miracle worker,” Mao replies with a laugh. He wants to kiss Ritsu's pain away, but with how his burns are, that would probably make the pain even worse. Inspecting Ritsu's body, he notices a spot on the underside of his forearm that's colored a cream white, not burned like the rest of him.

So, ever so gently, he grasps Ritsu's hand and pulls it towards him, pressing a chaste kiss to the spot that the sun has yet to mark. He feels Ritsu let out a soft _ah,_ in surprise, and smirks a bit. When he looks up, he sees Ritsu's eyes fixated on his lips, and a blush creeping onto his ears.

“I hope your burns can heal soon, Ritsu~"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no regrets


	6. ...on a falling tear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ritsu's silence falls over Mao like ice, and after a week of dealing with it, he decides to deal with it himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is so long?? At least for these little one shots. It's 1.4k words...
> 
> Tired

_ Something's wrong with Ritsu. _

Mao concludes this as he walks home. Ritsu is at his side, although that's a rather generous ter considering the fact that Ritsu is at least a foot away from him and stubbornly avoiding eye contact, quite a change from his usual clinging to Mao.

Honestly, he should've realized sooner—he should've realized when Ritsu refused to talk to him, only shrugging when Mao tried to talk to him. Whatever words Mao had coaxed out of him had been released as biting remarks.

Has he done something? Mao thinks back to the past couple days, but can't remember anything significant. It could very well be because Ritsu has been losing sleep (for the past few days, he's been awake by the time Mao got to his room, and once, even been dressed; that coupled with the fact that his undereyes look that of a raccoon’s are extremely telling), but if that's the case, then why on Earth has Ritsu been losing sleep in the first place.

It must be something he did; he's been treating everyone else the same, it's just him that's being rejected like this.

“Ritsu,” he says into the open air, even though he has nothing to say. Ritsu doesn't even spare him a glance. Abandoning his attempt to talk to Mao, instead turns to observe him silently.

His sunken features and sickly pale skin almost recalls that of the president’s, and Mao's motherly instincts almost make him want to watch over Ritsu for the rest of the week to take care of them. Like that would go ever well.

They reach Ritsu's house, and Ritsu walks up to front door without even acknowledging Mao, like he doesn't even exist. After a moment's hesitation, Mao runs up to his side.

The look Ritsu sends Mao could only be translated to  _ what do you want? _ , and it makes his heart ache.

“I'm coming with you,” he tells Ritsu, knowing trying to ask would just end in rejection. Ritsu's pointed gaze grows even more suspicious at that, and Mao almost feels afraid to be here, at this house he's been visiting since he was a child.

Like the rest of the time they've spent together this week, the time they're spending now is cloaked in a spell of awkwardness, and Ritsu seems to almost walk with conviction as he walks up the stairs.

Once they enter Ritsu's room, Mao sets his things down by the door, and takes a seat at Ritsu's desk. Ritsu just tumbles onto the bed, staring at the his hands on his lap once he sits himself upright.

“So,” Mao starts, “I did something to upset you, right? You've been treating me like a stranger the entire week.”

If his words affect Ritsu, he doesn't show it. “You've had more time to yourself,” he says simply, as if that answers all of Mao’s unasked questions.

“What?”

Ritsu doesn't elaborate, and silence falls over them like ice. Mao gives Ritsu another one over, and realizes that, despite Ritsu's efforts to seem nonchalant, he's tense all over, fidgeting with his hands.

“You're nervous,” he states for no particular reason, before adding, “Do you think I should be mad at you for something?”

Bullseye. Ritsu visibly flinches at this, as if Mao's words are arrows that only just managed to reach him. He stays silent.

“Whatever it is, I'm not mad, so you don't need to worry, alright?” Mao tells him, hoping that maybe Ritsu will be comfortable enough to open up. No such luck.

He does, however, get a few words out of Ritsu. “You're lying.”

_ What? _

Why would Mao need to lie in the first place? Too many questions linger in the air between them, and Mao feels like it's suffocating him.

“I'm not, though? C'mon, Ritsu, I'll get mad if you don't say anything,” he coaxes.

This must resonate somewhere in Ritsu, because through pointed words, he answers.

“You're always annoyed with me lately. Always telling me to 'be more independent’, and that you 'have too much to do to deal with me’; I tried to be more independent, but I just made more mistakes,” he looks up at Mao, “You could he doing work right now. You're being nice now, but you'll scold me tomorrow for this, won't you?”

_ That's _ what he was worried about?

Those half-serious remarks he'd made to Ritsu, those jests about how Ritsu is just a big baby—that's why Ritsu is so depressed?

Hearing that sends a wave of guilt over Mao. He tries to speak but Ritsu interrupts him.

“If you want to leave me, can't you just go without a fuss. It's even more pathetic of me if you think you need to stay out of pity, Isara-kun,” he chokes on Mao’s name.

_ Mao’s name. _

Not the drawled out  _ Maa-kun _ he's grown accustomed to, not even Mao, but Isara-kun, like he's referring to a stranger. Is this his Ritsu?

He looks up to inspect Ritsu, and notices with crippling guilt that tears bead the red eyes of the other boy.

“Ritsu—”

“Don't call me that,” Ritsu interjects. “You don't need to feel guilty, either, I know…” he trails off, and a beat passes in silence before he regains his words, “I know that it's my fault that you don't want to be around me anymore. I know I'm lazy, that I sleep too much, that I'm too clingy—I know. It just… it hurts even more if you stay around like this, like you're giving me some kind of false hope. I just want you to leave me alone, Isara-kun.”

His confession renders Mao speechless. Has he really been pushing away Ritsu to the point where Ritsu thinks he hates him? Does Ritsu not realize what the hint of sadness in his eyes whenever Ritsu does something vastly independent of him means? Does he really think Mao is that heartless?

_ Actually _ , Mao decides,  _ I am that heartless. _

Mao can't stop himself as he stands up and walks over to Ritsu’s side of the room, sitting down on the bed with little more than a centimeter between them. Is possible, Ritsu becomes even more tense, freezing up completely as his shoulders brush Mao’s.

“Ritsu,” he starts softly. Ritsu has nothing more to hide, he figures, because he actually turns his head to look at Mao. A few tears have fallen down his cheeks,  and his gaze is so open, so  _ fragile _ , like he's about to burst into sobs at any moment—like looking at Mao pains him.

“Ritsu, do you really want me to leave you?”

Ritsu swallows nervously—Mao can see his adam's apple bob slightly—and his lip quivers violently.

“I—I just… I—” he stumbles over his words like he has no idea what he even thinks. “I… I don't. I- I want to stay with you, but I—I'm afraid, I—I—” a sob swallows his words, and leans over to curl himself against Mao's chest. “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Maa-kun! I—I'm sorry that I'm selfish, and lazy, I'm sorry! I'm sorry that I keep clinging to you; I'm sorry that I mess up whenever I try to make things easier for you! I'm sorry that I'm apologising like I even deserve to, I'm just,” another sob steals his words, “I'm so sorry, Maa-kun!” he wails into Mao's chest.

A knot forms in Mao’s chest as he listens, tears beading his own eyes. His tears fall as easily as Ritsu's, and his body collapses into Ritsu's as he pulls him closer with trembling arms.

“No, Ritchan, don't say that,” he swallows a sob, ‘I should be the one who says it—I'm sorry, Ritchan! I promise, I won't push you away again, just… please, stay with me! Honestly,  _ you're  _ the one  _ I  _ don't deserve! You're always there for me and supporting me; I wouldn't have made it this far without you! Ritchan, I… I love you  _ so  _ much, please forgive me.”

He feels Ritchan shuffle in his arms, the older boy pulling his head out to look up at Mao. His face is a glorious display of his emotions, tear-stained cheeks growing pink, and an unabashed smile breaking out over his lips. A few tears still fall down his cheeks, so Mao leans closer, and presses his lips one, right in the corner of Ritsu's lips. Ritsu is ticklish, it seems, because he laughs slightly at the sensation.

“Maa-kun, I love you, too,” he tells Mao, falling limply into Mao's arms. Mao pulls him closer, relishing in the feeling of it.

They're home again, safe in each other's arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know either


	7. ...to shut the other up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's unfair of Mao to try and talk to him when all Ritsu can focus on is the movement of his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying.
> 
> Also, when it mentions that smirk, it's meant to be describing the expression from Mao's band ensemble card, but.. tired

“Maa-kun,” Ritsu whines, elongating Mao’s nickname slightly. He leans back on the sofa, trying to reach for Mao’s hand next to his head.

“Just a little bit longer,” Mao responds; this is the third time he's responded with that, and he's starting to sound like a broken record.

“It was 'just a little longer’ an hour ago,” Ritsu points out, but Mao only waves him off. Ritsu has half the mind to go sit on Mao’s paperwork, he's been ignored for the past two hours, and watching Mao work instead of pay attention to him has given him no shortage of frustration. “Maa-kun, c'mon, cuddle with me—you can do the work after.”

“What if Kaichou and Fukukaichou come back?” Mao asks offhandedly, it's not like he's  _ actually _ intending to give in to Ritsu.

“I'll yell at them for overworking you,” Ritsu answers.

Mao just shakes his head. His hand resumes working at a quickened pace, and briefly, Ritsu wonders if he's working so hard so that he can spend more time with Ritsu without feeling guilty.

If it's just for a few minutes, then he thinks he might be okay waiting—he gets to watch Mao work, after all. He likes watching Mao, seeing that determined look on his face, brows furrowed and lip bitten when he can't decide what to write.

He doesn't deserve Mao, doesn't deserve to have someone to have someone who comes to wake him up every morning, who lends him notes to study from (although it's redundant considering the fact that Ritsu never uses them), doesn't deserve to know the feeling of Mao leaning over him, bodies hot from nerves, and smiling down at him coyly. He doesn't deserve it, but he's selfish, so he'll keep it to himself.

Speaking of, there are lots of other expressions Mao could he making right now. He could be blushing in embarrassment from Ritsu teasing him, or laughing joyously, or—the best—making that teasing, coy smirk at him that's oh, so rare.

On the thought of that face, and what it usually implies, Ritsu notices the beads of sweat rolling down his neck, and feels his own face heat up—although it's probably unnoticeable to most others—before wondering if his own neck is caked in sweat.

“Could you not stare at me?”

Ritsu registers the movements of Mao’s lips before the words he speaks, and after a moment, looks up to meet his gaze.

“I have nothing else to do,” Ritsu tells him, and it's  _ true _ , there's basically nothing else he could do besides sleep that wouldn't annoy Mao.

“Still, it's distracting,” Mao complains, before shaking his head. “Actually, since I'm working on Knights proposal, I wanna talk to you about it.” Ritsu just nods. “Do you guys split the proposal work? It's like everytime I some paperwork from you, it's filled out in different handwriting. Yours the most, though, which surprised me at first. Oh, but you're Knights’ strategist, right? At least, that's what they call you. Doing work for other people, I'm proud of you Ritsu. Keep up the good work.”

As Mao continues speaking, Ritsu stops paying attention. It's so  _ unfair _ that Mao thinks it's alright to keep talking, moving his oh, so kissable lips, and even praising Ritsu. His gaze singles in on Mao’s lips, and he has a thought—maybe  _ that _ could shut him.

“—are doing more work now, so it's beginning to feel like you're a threat again. Oi, Ritsu, you were whining about me ignoring you, at least pay attention when I—”

The rest of his sentence is swallowed by Ritsu's eager lips, as the older boy cups his cheeks with his hands and leans forward to kiss him. Mao freezes at first, but melts against him like he always does. His hands reach Ritsu's neck, pulling him in closer, as he meets Ritsu's tongue with his own. It feels so  _ nice _ to Ritsu, and he only pulls away when he needs air.

“So Maa-kun’s not completely against kissing me here, huh? I've always wondered what it would be like to have a student council member bend me over one of the desks here,” it's not a complete lie, he's thought of Mao doing that he's sure, but right now, he's only saying it to get a reaction out of Mao, “Maybe you could—”

Mao doesn't need to Ritsu to finish that sentence to know that it'll be utterly embarrassing. Honestly, he's not completely opposed to the idea of what Ritsu's suggesting but it’d be way too embarrassing to admit that.

Now, it's his turn to shut Ritsu up with a kiss.


	8. ...in secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five kisses they've shared in secret, and one that's (almost) shared in public.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did that really cliche thing because I'm lazy.
> 
> This is the second oneshot that was over 1k words.

1.

Their first kiss is shared when they're thirteen and fourteen respectively. The two of them are walking home from school, Mao carrying both of their bags, Ritsu slowly clumbering behind him.

“Hey, hey, Maa-kun, have you kissed anyone before?”

It's asked casually, like it's just a question (maybe that's all it is), _definitely not_ a suggestion of any sort. _Definitely_ _not_.

“No, why?” Mao responds.

“I wanna try. C'mon, Maa-kun, what's stopping you?”

“What if someone sees?” Mao asks apprehensively. There isn't anyone in his field of vision, but he  _ really  _ doesn't want to risk it.

Ritsu just pulls him behind one of their neighbor's bushes, leaning closely against him. “It'll be our little secret.”

Like this, Mao figures he has nothing to lose, and hesitantly presses a kiss to Ritsu's lips.

 

2.

“I like you, Ritsu,” Mao tells Ritsu with a red face and clenched fists. They're the last two in the class, and you could hear a pin drop in the silence following his confession.

It's been three years since their first kiss, but not much had changed since then. In fact, it had been forgotten fairly quickly.

At least, Mao  _ thinks  _ Ritsu forgot it; he definitely hasn't, and that thought is absolutely humiliating.

A lot must have changed since then, enough for him to be standing here after their shared class duty and telling him that he likes him as far more than a friend.

At first, Ritsu just looks up at him questionably, before nodding. “I see. Can I kiss you? No one's around.”

Were it possible, Mao’s face would've gotten even redder.

“W-What?” he squeaks out.

“Please. It'll be a secret.”

Well, that's a lot for Mao to unpack. For one thing, Ritsu actually said please, and he's right, the likelihood of someone actually finding them is low, so maybe, it'll be alright.

He steps closer, and lets Ritsu pull him by his tie so that he can plant a kiss on his lips.

“Thank you; I like you, too.”

 

           3.

They kiss a lot after that, but it's always in secret. It'd be catastrophic if it got out that they're dating, so they're careful to never be too intimate under a public eyes.

But there's no one here now, there's no one watching them as they work on homework together in his room.

_ That's why,  _ Mao tells himself,  _ it's fine if we do things like this right now _ , as they lace their fingers together. He hears Ritsu's fingers tighten against his, and looks up.

“I finished this question before you, I want a reward,” he tells Mao, a mischievous tone underlying his words.

“Yeah? Like what?”

Ritsu doesn't answer, just leans in closer to let their lips meet, before pulling away and breathing against his lips.

“That'll be all, thanks.”

 

4.

As the date of their second kiss (their first kiss as a couple, so it's what actually matters) grows farther away into the past, Ritsu grows even needier. Sometimes, he even dares to ask Mao for kisses in public.

It's the worst, having to explain to the others that it's just a joke, that Ritsu has a  _ terrible  _ sense of humor, as he scolds Ritsu for (in their classmates’ eyes) being obscene, and for (in Ritsu's eyes) being too needy in public.

That's why, as Ritsu pulls him into a bathroom stall after class, he has half the mind to run away. If a bathroom stall is Ritsu's idea of private, than he wonders how hard it'll get to keep their relationship secret in the future.

But when Ritsu grabs onto his shirt and pulls him closer to give him a heated kiss, he resolves that just this one, it's not  _ that _ bad of an idea.

(When Mao ends up having to squat on the toilet to hide when someone comes in, he changes his mind, and decides that it was an absolutely terrible idea.)

 

5.

Mao’s softened up as of late, and has become a lot more lenient, letting Ritsu cuddle up against him as he does student council work, even with the other student council members right there.

Ritsu's so cute like this, just cuddled up against his side, unmoving and silent, but definitely still awake. The thought that Ritsu is intently watching him work makes something in Mao’s heart jolt every time is crosses his mind.

So, when the rest of the student council members leave to get refreshments, Mao decides to indulge Ritsu, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. He should've known Ritsu would return it ten-fold, because now he's making out with Ritsu on the sofa in the student council office.

 

It's ironic, really, that the first kiss Mao initiates is at a time when other people (people he needs to maintain a reputation around!) could come in at any time, but as Ritsu shivers under his touch, he decides he doesn't mind.

 

(Luckily, he manages to conjure enough self control to stop his assault on Ritsu's lips before the others get back, and once they return, only Yuzuru sends them a suspicious look.)

 

6.

It's hard not to think about kissing Ritsu as he watches the other boy send winks to him that were supposed to be reserved for the audience.

It's even harder once they get off the stage, and Mao has to see Ritsu sweating and out of breath, and just so  _ kissable,  _ even though there are others around.

There are seven other pairs of eyes that could catch him in the act of kissing Ritsu, seven other faces that would display different reactions to such a scene, and it embarrasses Mao even more that he can recite this off the top of his head.

_ I could just play it off as hug _ , he thinks to himself,  _ they'd have no idea. _

Yeah, that seems subtle enough, they hug all the time, so he walks over to wrap his arms around Ritsu. As he does so, he brushes Ritsu's lips with his, and feels fireworks go off in his stomach.

When they pull away, it relieves Mao that six other teenagers are all engaging in conversation with each other, definitely not paying their embrace a second thought.

Wait, only six?

He looks over to offender, Arashi, who seems awfully quiet considering how many people are here for him to talk to. When Arashi notices his gaze, he looks up with a wink, putting a finger over his lips.

There's no way that they're the only two in on this secret now.


	9. ...in public

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mao goes to great lengths to motivate Ritsu, even if it means copius (depending on who you ask) displays of affection in public.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm big tired.
> 
> Arashi was surprising fun to write, and yes, I'm aware that I overused italics.

“Hey, hey, Mao-chan,” Arashi speaks from beside Mao. The two of them are cleaning the blackboard together after class, Arashi having decided that he should 'help out once in a while’ which in Mao’s mind, translates roughly to: I have something to tease you about relentlessly, or: I am genuinely concerned for you. Mao takes a wild guess, and decides on the former.

Still, he can't just ignore Arashi, so he turns his head and asks, “Need something?”

Arashi grins a bit, nothing too much, it could easily be ridden off as just a smile from the acknowledgement from Mao, but knowing him, he's definitely ready to tease Mao to hell and back about something.

“No, nothing  _ in particular _ . But I was  _ wondering _ ,” Arashi does that a lot, he accentuates the words in his speech in a way that makes it impossible to think he doesn't have something up his sleeve. Mao swallows, things aren't looking good for him. “You know how Ritsu-chan is with sleeping and all, yeah? Well, it was fine, at a time, but recently, we've been a lot more pressed for time, and it'd be  _ really _ nice if you could help me with that.’

A moment of awkward silence goes by, before Mao responds, “I don't mean to be rude, Narukami, but do think I haven't tried?”

Instantly, Arashi's eyes widen, and he waves his hand in a gesture that says  _ it's nothing like that! _ “No, no, not at all! Rather, I think you haven't tried that  _ right  _ things.”

“What do you mean by 'right things’?” Mao asks, not entirely on the same wavelength. He begins to question whether he ever will be.

“Like, you need to understand Ritsu-chan’s motivations, right?” A nod from Mao. “ _ You are  _ his motivation, but, like, not in the  _ right _ way. You're not, this is gonna sound really bad, but don't think less of me, exploiting that motivation he gets from you correctly, you know?”

Mao, for his part, listens intently, and doesn't throw Arashi's words away or take them at face value. Despite this, his stance doesn't change.

Mao  _ doesn't  _ know.

“I've tried to motivate him, I praise him and stuff, but that doesn't exactly make the biggest difference, especially if I'm not involved,” Mao tells him.

“See,  _ that's _ the problem, Mao-chan,” a devilish smile, “For Ritsu-chan having you 'praise him and stuff’, isn't enough. In order to really motivate him, you need to understand the heart of a girl in love,” and then Arashi giggles, with a shit-eating grin on his face.

_ This can only go in one direction _ , Mao thinks abruptly.

“Excuse me, what?” A beat of silence, before Mao elaborates. “I get that Ritsu is super clingy and stuff, but how exactly does that make him a 'girl in love’?”

Arashi giggles again, high-pitched and light, like glass against glass. “You need a change in perspective, Mao-chan! It's  _ obvious _ , of course Ritsu-chan thinks about you like that! I mean, if you don't believe, you could always just ignore my request and go about your own business, but…”

“Your request being?”

“To motivate Ritsu-chan, you should try giving him a kiss, Mao-chan!”

_ Oh. _

So this is what Arashi was giving him trouble over. He should've known.

“ _ Here _ ?” he asks, trying to ignore the fact that his skin feels warmer. “With everyone around?”

“C'mon, Mao-chan! Please, I'll pay you back!” Arashi responds, like he just asked Mao to go buy him a Coke from the vending machine.

“I- Y'know what, it's fine just this once, I guess. You'd better be right about this motivating him, Narukami,” Mao decides with questionable resolve.

They move over towards Ritsu's desk together, the boy in question sleeping in a slumped position over his desk. In case Mao has any reserves left, seeing just how angelic Ritsu's face is when he sleeps is enough to push them to the side.

“Ritsu, wake up,” he demands, tapping on the other boy's nose. After a few moments, Ritsu's eyes flicker open, before focusing themselves on Mao.

“What? I'm tired,” he drawls.

Mao doesn't answer, only leaning forward to press his lips to Ritsu's in a chaste kiss. From behind him, he hears Arashi laugh (the bastard), and somewhere off to the side, he hears cursing from Koga, a confuses  _ nneh?  _ from Mika, and a hushed giggle from Yuzuru.

Then, he remembers:  _ he's kissing Ritsu in public. _

With that thought, he immediately pulls away, face as red as his hair, getting to eye Ritsu's slightly surprised face before it melts into a grin.

“Oh, what's this about? Am I really  _ that  _ irresistible?” he asks.

“Motivation, Ritsu. Go participate in practice, okay? I'll come pick you up after,” he tells Ritsu automatically, like he was set to autorun in the heat of the moment, before walking out the door, picking up his bag along the way.

Just as he steps out the door, he hears Ritsu speak up _—_

“If that's what Maa-kun wants, then fine, I guess I will.”

_—_ and secretly, he smiles to himself.

These emotions don't have to be made public, even if the kiss that spurred them on was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very tired.


	10. ... desperately

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He really wants to kiss Ritsu.
> 
> Because there's absolutely no way he can watch his boyfriend dance up on that stage, pale skin glowing under the light, and looking undoubtedly charming and just tempting, and not want to kiss him.
> 
> Mao should face it, he's getting pretty desperate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda just stopped doing this once school started...
> 
> Not sure how long I can keep this up but have at least another chapter

Mao isn't the type to act obscene, certainly not in public. Like a respectable person, he keeps all of his affection private (mostly), and saves it for the person it's meant for.

Well, it's not like he's expressing affection to anyone in particular right now, but….

Staring at Ritsu with a look of awe and face dyed redder than his hair during a live while surrounded by other people certainly isn't _private._

But it's not like it's completely his fault–Ritsu ought to share the blame as well. What with how his shirt is left mostly unbuttoned, and the way he sways naturally across the stage, winking at just the right times to make Mao's heart jumpstart. When his lips part, and his voice flows out into the live venue like honey, all sweet and _rich,_ Mao's heartbeat matches its rhythm, rampaging wildly in his chest.

That's not bringing up the parts of Ritsu's performance that weren't planned: the determined look on his face, and the beads of sweat rolling down his neck and under his shirt, and in that moment Mao decides that he's screwed.

He _really_ wants to kiss Ritsu.

Because there's absolutely no way he can watch his boyfriend dance up on that stage, pale skin glowing under the light, and looking undoubtedly charming and just _tempting_ , and not want to kiss him.

Mao should face it, he's getting pretty desperate.

So when the live is finally over, Mao rushes to the backstage area, brandishing his backstage pass like a badge of honor. Everyone besides Ritsu, is already done changing, and Arashi waves Mao over.

“Welcome, Mao-chan! You're here for Ritsu-chan, right?” he sing-songs, like it isn't obvious why Mao is here. “He's waiting for you in the dressing room, so don't keep him waiting!”

Mao nods, accompanied by a rushed _thanks_ , as he quickly makes his way to the dressing room. Like Arashi had said, Ritsu is waiting for him. He hasn't even bothered to try and change, evidently still waiting for Mao to come and do it for him. Turning back to meet Mao's gaze, Ritsu smiles warmly, and seeing that soft curve of Ritsu's lips and being exposed to a close-up view of the sweat dripping down Ritsu's neck proves to be too much for Mao, who instantly rushes forward.

When their lips collide for a kiss, it's beyond sloppy, and not even that good, but it's exactly what Mao needs in the moment, so he doesn't mind. He loops his arms around Ritsu's back, letting his tongue glaze over Ritsu's teeth. When they need a breath of air, Mao parts the distance, and is met with the sight of Ritsu staring up at him curiously, a question beading in his eyes.

“Shut up,” he mutters, even though Ritsu hasn't said anything.

Those precious lips of Ritsu's curl up into a smirk, and he brings his arms up to cup Mao's cheek. “You don't know what I'm gonna say.”

“Don't test me. Knowing you, you're definitely not gonna say the right thing.”

A moment passes in silence, Ritsu just staring up at Mao, and Mao wonders if this would be a reasonable cause of death on an autopsy.

“I want you to kiss me again; I like it when you're desperate and assertive like this.”

“Damnit, Ritsu,” Mao starts, but he knows he doesn't need to finish it–Ritsu already knows what he was going to say.

He'd gotten it right, said exactly what Mao wanted to hear.

But he still asks, in that teasing drawl that makes him even more tempting to Mao.

“Did I get it right?”

And it's too tempting for Mao to even bother responding in voice, this time letting his tongue meet Ritsu's as he answers through a desperate kiss.


	11. ...out of joy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It only takes the promise of forever, and joy blossoms in their chests.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sad I needed a pick up
> 
> Glad this wasn't an angsty prompt

Mao's hand wrapped around Ritsu's is a familiar, comforting warmth, and Ritsu smiles as Mao leads him around the park. Mao doesn't say anything, offers no explanations for why he's dragging Ritsu around the park close to midnight, but Ritsu doesn't mind, and savors the feeling of the two of them invading each other's warmth.

Moonlight casts shadows of the two of them, two different silhouettes bound as one by the joining of their hands, by the way that their intertwined fingers grip onto each other tightly.

“Maa-kun,” he speaks, voice filling the air like he's pouring cream into coffee—not breaking the warmth, the affection, of the moment, but adding a new flavor that Mao will surely find delicious.

“Yeah?” Mao answers, voice slightly hushed but still perfectly audible in Ritsu's ears.

“Is there a reason we're out here?” he asks, and Mao finally turns around to face him. The streetlight hits his cheeks and the bridge of his nose, making him look like something out of a painting, another snapshot for Ritsu to hold on to.

“There is. Do you remember when we first met?”

“Mhm, it was here. I was under the tree and you came and annoyed me.” A slight giggle passes through Ritsu's lips, and when his eyes meet Mao's, the redhead mirrors the gesture with a chuckle.

“I'm glad I came and annoyed you,” Mao jokes, before straightening out his tone. “I'm really glad I got to meet you.”

“Fufu, I wonder. You always seem so annoyed when you have to wake me up, I'm not sure if you can handle being stuck with a vampire for your lifetime.”

He swears Mao takes in a breath, suddenly realizing how oddly timid the redhead has been. Not through words, but by the way that he seems acutely aware of every little gesture between them, like he's afraid that something will go wrong.

“Actually, Ritsu, I wanted to talk about that…” he trails off, averting Ritsu's gaze.

_ Oh no,  _ Ritsu thinks, and the thought echoes as panic spreads through his body, rippling like splashes in water, Mao's words being the stone that set them off.

This is the part where Mao tells Ritsu that he's had enough of him—of waking him up, of carrying him around, of the intimate cuddling sessions that Ritsu always forces him into—this is the part where he breaks up with Ritsu and then runs away completely. Nervousness becomes a dagger in Ritsu's chest as he waits for Mao to lay it upon him.

But Mao doesn't say anything, instead reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small box, lowering down onto his knees and oh, Ritsu hasn't considered  _ that  _ as a possibility. Even so, here Mao is, opening the box to reveal an ornate ring, and Ritsu's heart twists with a brand-new emotion. When he speaks, raw emotions pour from his soul out into the air around them, and, to Ritsu, it's like being stabbed in the chest with an arrow of light.

“I know I'm already stuck with you forever, but I really wanted to ask you this: if you would be mine until we die. I know I'm not perfect and sometimes I overlook your feelings, that I'm sometimes too irritable when I'm taking care of you, but I still want to be the one to treasure you for the rest of your days. You taught me a lot of things, and helped me a lot, and you're the person dearest to me, Ritsu, no, Ritchan. If you'd have me, I'll do my best to always be there for you, and I'll always wake you up even if you're in a bad mood, and I'd never let go of your hand. From the day I met you, Ritchan, I… I've loved you, and I'm ready to love you until I'm old and grey. … Ritchan, will you marry me?”

For a moment Ritsu can't answer, stuck in a daze and wondering if this is really happening. It is, Mao doesn't move from where he is, staring up at Ritsu.

Hesitantly, he moves a hand towards Mao, who gingerly takes it in his own.

“Of course, Maa-kun.”

And Mao smiles, all warm and bright, and it's like someone poured sunlight into the air between them. His touch is feather-light as he slides the ring onto Ritsu's ring finger, before pressing a kiss over it. Once he's done, he stands, and scoops Ritsu into his arms in a movement that makes Ritsu's chest jolt.

Wrapping his arms around Mao's neck and leaning his forehead against Mao’s, he gently brings a hand up to brush against Mao's cheek. Something sticky meets his palm, and he laughs quietly.

“Are you crying, Maa-kun?”

Mao's lips curl up into a smile, eyes half-moons of delight as he pulls Ritsu closer.

“Maybe—I'm really happy. Really, Ritchan, I love you.”

Ritsu giggles once more, the mellifluous sound dancing between them as he brings his lips closer to Mao's.

“And I love you, too, don't ever forget that.”

There's no way, Ritsu thinks, Mao will be able to forget it—not with the gentle kiss that follows, warming their hearts up as the love swelling in their hearts bursts and leaves joy in its wake.


	12. ...out of grief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grief has its own taste, smell, sound, feel, and touch, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I passed out twice while writing this, which is why it is two days late

Grief tastes like the coffee that Ritsu had left unsweetened on the counter when he went to pick up the phone, and later had taken a sip to try and soothe himself, but had forgotten that he hadn't had the chance to add creme, and instead had to drink it cold and bitter.

It sounds like that butler's voice, in an all too smooth tone explaining the tragedy, the message that had been recorded and sent out to everyone; as well as the whispers between students, and the sounds of sobbing in the bathroom.

It smells of medicine—that god awful scent that reeks through the hospital when the students pay a visit, even though it really doesn't make a difference for the person they're visiting.

It feels like the lingering presence of a ghost—maybe not the best way to describe it, the soul of its owner still rests within its body—a laugh gilded in gold, and a light touch against his shoulder that tells him he must be hallucinating, because only Hajime is there besides him, and Hajime is sitting across the table and clutching onto his teacup.

It looks like the student council's distress, their bodies hunched over the desks, not looking up, around, afraid to look over to the empty chair, their faces distressed, tired, and sometimes, Keito's eyes look red from crying.

He hadn't expected to grieve for Eichi, no one had, maybe  _ fine _ and Keito, and a few others who are just too kind to not grieve, but certainly not him. Technically, his grieving hasn't met the first step yet, Eichi hasn't died, but he probably isn't going to awaken from that coma anytime soon, if ever.

He'd brought a keyboard down to the courtyard where the tea club activities take place, and now sits there coaxing melodies out of his fingertips. They're all sorrowful, funeral songs and other generally unhappy tunes. Maybe he should play happy songs instead, try to lighten up the mood, but right now, he can't bring himself to do it, so everything he plays is in the minor key.

He hears footsteps, but doesn't turn away, whoever is coming can sort themselves out. The footsteps come to a halt by the piano, and a hand is placed on Ritsu's shoulder.

“Ritsu,” he hears, and turns because it's  _ Mao _ and Mao is always his priority. “You're still here? I thought you always slept through club.”

"Someone needs to watch over Haa-kun,” Ritsu tells him, leaving out that half of the reason is that he'd feel guilty to not pick up after Eichi. “Did something happen in the student council?”

A pursed lip, brows furrowed, and Ritsu knows what Mao's going to say just from his face. “I feel like  _ Fukukaichou  _ is becoming suicidal. Half the time he doesn't even work anymore, and he hasn't lectured Himemiya at all. Well, Himemiya is kinda productive now, but still.”

“What about you?”

For a second, Mao looks taken aback. “Huh? What about?”

“Isn't it hard for you, too?”

Now, Mao's face is pensive, silence overtaking them for a moment as he collects his thoughts. “It is, but I wasn't that close to him. Ritsu,  _ you're _ not suicidal yourself, are you?”

Forced laughter through clenched teeth is the reply. “No, I'm not as bad as Kei-chan. It's just… Ecchan wasn't absolutely awful. I miss him.”

“I understand. Hey, let's go get some flowers for his room tomorrow.” Mao's tone is a light whisper, like he's trying to sooth Ritsu.

“If you want.”

Another pause; “Do you think  _ Kaichou _ would mind if I broke a little rule here?”

“Probably not. What do you want to do?”

He isn't answered in words, instead, with the soft press of lips against his own. When they part, Mao leans his head against Ritsu's.

“I'll ask  _ Fukukaichou _ if there's anything else I can do. I don't want you to be sad, Ritchan.”

**Author's Note:**

> My IG is twinwingedaria, if you want to talk to me about anything.


End file.
